JANUARY 3rd, PART II -- Seven Reader Submissions

[ Reader Submissions ring in the New Year: ]


GO TO NEW YEAR'S PARTY / GET STABBED

PLAY PAYED [sic] GIG IN REGINA / COME BACK $300 POORER

PRINCE WILLIAM IS ENGAGED? / WHO CARES, KATZ IS GETTING MARRIED!

HAPPY NEW YEAR / I'M DRUNK

COLD WEATHER SURPRISES US EVERY YEAR / HOMICIDES DO NOT

FIREWORKS! / BOOM! POW! WHOOOOOOO!

I'M COLD / AND I HATE EVERYTHING
[ Reader Submissions feature here, each and every Monday of the year, from the Winnipeg Cat Meme Generator. ]